If you’re having trouble in your relationship, especially if you are currently married, then there are a few different directions that you can go. The two of you can work for a resolution. You might try a separation. Or, the relationship could end in a divorce. In all of those instances, you should think clearly through what the ramifications and consequences are so that you can make the best concurrent decision possible with your partner.
There are many different ways that you can look at your possible options. First of all, you might find it worth it to try therapy with your spouse. If there are still things that concern you, maybe the two of you want a trial separation. If you can’t reconcile, it’s vital that you look at grounds for divorce together. And, throughout all of these processes, you should be able to separate your emotional reactions from your pragmatic decisions.
Try Therapy First
One of the first steps that you should do if you’re having trouble with your spouse is to go to couples therapy. Many people feel that there is a stigma behind going to a therapist or counselor, but when they actually go to a session, they realize that concern is unfounded. A professional therapist or counselor can open up the lines of communication necessary for people to decide logically if they can get along together or not.
If you feel like it would be helpful, having a trial separation with your spouse might be something worthwhile to pursue. This way you aren’t getting a divorce, but you see what it feels like to be divorced. This keeps all of the legal and social issues out of the equation while giving you both an effective dose of what life may be like after the divorce is finalized. Many people will find that after a trial separation, their decision is much more explicit about whether to divorce or not.
Grounds for Divorce
Depending on the attitude of your spouse, you may have to discuss grounds for divorce in the first place. There are times when one person wants to get divorced, but the other one does not. When that happens, there are a lot of implications for how the divorce will proceed. If one person is not on board, the other person has to decide what steps to take to get the divorce without the consent of the other party.
Separating Emotion and Pragmatism
Getting a divorce is a very emotional event. However, the emotions can’t get in the way of the pragmatic side of it. There are legal implications to separation, and bank accounts, property ownership, child support, and custody are all going to be on the table. You need to talk with your spouse in detail about all of these things before you begin the divorce process so that there won’t be frustration and anxiety about things later.